the least of Gods mercies are to good for me, and the heaviest of Gods plagues are too little for me. Nay, the Soul finds no end in pleading, and therefore he reasons thus with himself, and saith, that God cannot do more against him then he hath deserved; but be sure, he thinks that God will not lay more upon him then he is worthy of. Nay, it is sure the Soul cannot bear nor suffer so much, as he hath deserved and plucked upon himself, if God should proceed in rigour with him. For the sinner that will deal plainly, and discerns his evil exactly; it is easy for him to number up all his abominations, and the Soul thus reasons with it self, and saith, I only deserve eternal condemnation; for the wages of all sin is death, being committed against an infinite Majesty, and against a Divine Justice, and then, what do all these my sins deserve, committed, and continued in, and maintained against ⟨p. 103⟩the light of Gods Word, against all corrections, and all checks of conscience, and all the Commandments of God, hell is too good, and ten thousand hells is to little to torment such a wretch as I am. In truth, I begged mercy, but what, I mercy? I am ashamed to expect it, and with what heart can I beg this mercy which I have trodden under my feet? Shall that blood of Christ purge my heart, that blood that I have trampled under my feet, and accounted it as an unholy thing? and when the Lord hath wooed me, and his wounds were bleeding, and his sides gored, and his hideous cries coming into mine ears, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me, yet this Christ have I slighted, and made nothing of his blood, and can the blood of Christ do me any service? indeed I do crave grace, but how do I think to receive any. All the pillars of the Church can testify, how often grace, and mercy hath been offered to me, but I have refused it; therefore how can I beg any grace? And as the text saith, They shall see their sin and acknowledge their ways, and Judge themselves worthy to be condemned. So the Soul confesseth, that it is worthy of nothing that is good, it is not worthy of Gods love, nor of Gods preservation nor any other privilege, only he confesseth that he doth loath himself, and saith, Oh this stubbornness, and villainy, and this wretchedness of mine? what I mercy?
the least of Gods mercies are to good for mee, and the heaviest of Gods plagues are too little for mee. Nay, the Soule finds no end in pleading, and therefore he reasons thus with himselfe, and saith, that God cannot doe more against him then he hath deserved; but be sure, he thinkes that God will not lay more upon him then hee is worthy of. Nay, it is sure the Soule cannot beare nor suffer so much, as he hath deserved and pluckt upon himselfe, if God should proceed in rigour with him. For the sinner that will deale plainely, and discernes his evill exactly; it is easie for him to number up all his abhominations, and the Soule thus reasons with it selfe, and saith, I onely deserve eternall condemnation; for the wages of all sinne is death, being committed against an infinite Majestie, and against a Divine Iustice, and then, what doe all these my sinnes deserve, committed, and continued in, and maintained against ⟨p. 103⟩the light of Gods Word, against all corrections, and all checks of conscience, and all the Commandements of God, hell is too good, and ten thousand hels is to little to torment such a wretch as I am. In truth, I begged mercy, but what, I mercy? I am ashamed to expect it, and with what heart can I beg this mercy which I have troden under my feet? Shall that blood of Christ purge my heart, that blood that I have trampled under my feet, and accounted it as an unholy thing? and when the Lord hath woed mee, and his wounds were bleeding, and his sides goared, and his hideous cryes comming into mine eares, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken mee, yet this Christ have I slighted, and made nothing of his blood, and can the blood of Christ doe mee any service? indeed I doe crave grace, but how doe I thinke to receive any. All the pillars of the Church can testifie, how often grace, and mercy hath beene offered to me, but I have refused it; therefore how can I begge any grace? And as the text saith, They shall see their sinne and acknowledge their wayes, and Iudge themselves worthy to be condemned. So the Soule confesseth, that it is worthy of nothing that is good, it is not worthy of Gods love, nor of Gods preservation nor any other priviledge, only he confesseth that he doth loath himselfe, and saith, Oh this stubbornnesse, and villany, and this wretchednesse of mine? what I mercy?
