The Soul's Preparation for Christ

Then gather up all, he that which out of the vileness which he seeth in sin is content to take shame to himself, and will not meddle with his sin, neither carelessly nor willingly, and is not cured by any thing saving by Christ, this man behaveth himself truly in the first place. Thus much of the trial.

Then gather up all, he that which out of the vilenesse which he seeth in sinne is content to take shame to himselfe, and will not meddle with his sinne, neither carelesly nor willingly, and is not cured by any thing saving by Christ, this man behaveth himselfe truly in the first place. Thus much of the tryall.

Secondly, again, the soul is restless in importuning the Lord for mercy, and will not be quieted till it get some evidence of Gods favour, the soul will take on nay, it will not be contented unless it can find some glimpse of acceptance through the goodness of God in Christ. This is plain, if a man be burdened with a weight, or ⟨p. 156⟩some heavy load that is laid upon him, if that he be fallen under his burden, he lieth there like to die, and if there be none near to succour him, all his care is to cry out for help, and though he seeth no man yet he crieth out, O help, help, for the Lords sake. Saul was without sight three days,¹ and no doubt he prayed to God all that while, as if he had resolved to give him no rest till he had found mercy: this is the nature of true sorrow, it ever drives a man to God, whereas reprobate sorrow drives a man from God: Nay, it may be, though the heart thinks it shall never find mercy, yet the Lord carrieth on the soul in an earnest desire, and using the means, and will not off from God, and from his word and sacraments and ordinances, Nay, though he sometime concludes that he shall never get mercy, nor get power against his corruptions; and then one saith, You had best leave off all; Nay, (saith the soul) I cannot be worse then I am, if I go to hell I will go this way. There is a kind of sorrow in the heart which is heavenly and godly, but reprobate sorrow even drives a man from God, and makes him say, if I am damned I am damned, if I be a reprobate I am so. O hou wretch, is this all? If a poor creature that is pressed under his burden crieth for help, when almost nature & strength doth fail, he crieth still for help, and that is all he can say, and so he dyes, and this is the last word that he speaks with a soft still voice O help, help: So it is with the soul of a poor languishing sinner, when the heart is burdened