The Soul's Preparation for Christ

For the proof of this point, see what the Prophet saith,¹ You shall consider your ways, and your doings that were not good, and shall loath your selves. A poor Christian would tear his heart in pieces in the apprehension of his own vileness, and saith, Good Lord, shall I ever be plagued and annoyed with this sturdy malicious heart? and shall I ever carry this vile heart about me, that will one day carry me to hell, if thou be not the more merciful? this makes a man even fall out with himself. Again, see what the Apostle saith, for this thing you have had godly sorrow, but what hath it wrought in you? doth it work a holy indignation and revenge against your sinful courses? that when thy soul seeth his filthy abominations rising, swelling, and bubbling within thy heart, it takes on exceedingly, and will scarce own it self; but looks away from sin, and is weary of it self, in regard of the same; Nay, (if it were possible) that thou couldest be content to live without a heart, even to forgo thy self, that so thou mayest not be troubled with that vile heart of thine, and so dishonour God no longer. I beseech you observe it, when a man is brought thus far, oh he cries to God, and saith, Lord was there ever any poor sinner thus pestered with a vile heart? Oh that this heart should ever be so ⟨p. 250⟩opposite against the Lord? Lord, except I had a better heart, I would I had none at all: thus the heart loathes it self, and in what measure the soul is carried with a restless dislike of sin, as it is sin, in the same degree it is most violent against those sins, whereby he hath most dishonoured God;² as you may see in Zacheus, his heart did most rise against his master sin; so the Lord having humbled the repentant Church, ³thou shalt defile thy graven Images of silver, and the ornaments of thy golden Images, thou shalt cast them away as a menstruous cloth, and say, get you hence. They hated all sin, but especially their Idolatrous courses; so it will be with the heart that is truly broken, he will cast away with hatred all his pleasing and profitable sins: thus much of the first passage.