A treatise tending unto a declaration whether a man be in the estate of…A treatise tending vnto a declaration whether a man be in the estate of…

Euseb. That which may do good unto other men I will never conceal though it be to my perpetual shame. As I was conceived & born in sin, so my Parents brought me up in ignorance & never showed me my shame and misery by Gods law: & I lived a long time, even as a man in a dead sleep or trance, and in truth I lived as though there were neither heaven nor hell, neither God nor Devil. And the Devil himself (as now I perceive) did often persuade my secure conscience that I was the child of God, and should be saved as well as the best man in the world: and I yielded to this persuasion, and did verily think it: so that when the preacher for wickedness and security denounced Gods judgements and hell fire, I have said unto my neighbours that I hoped I should be saved, and he should go to hell: and when I was asked whether I could keep all the commandments of the law I said that I could, and being asked whether I never sinned: I said I thought that otherwhiles I did, marry for them which were but few, I hoped God would have mercy, and have me excused. And all my ⟨p. 135⟩neighbours were glad of my company, they spoke well of me, and I was taken for an honest man, when as indeed, before God I was a vile beast, & the child of wrath, inspired with the spirit of the Devil continually. Well; afterward I heard the law preached and I saw and remembered many fearful judgements of GOD upon men whom I in reason thought were as good men as I, then I began to consider mine own estate, and to perceive my sins, and my cursedness, and upon a time above all other, the curse of the law made me inwardly afraid, and my flesh then began to tremble and quake: then I could not sleep in the night season, I was afraid of every thing. If I were in my house, I thought the house would fall on my head; if abroad, I thought every cranny of the earth would open it self wider and swallow me. I started at every straw, and at the moving of a fly: my meat was loathsome unto me, and I thought I was not worthy of so good a creature of God, and that God might justly turn it to my bane: the grief of my heart for my life past made me shed abundance of tears: and upon that I remembered (that I had heard read in the ⟨p. 136⟩Church, in Davids Psalms, that his tears were his drink, and that he did wet his bed with tears.

Euseb. That which may doe good vnto other men I will neuer conceale though it be to my perpetuall shame. As I was conceiued & born in sin, so my Parēts brought me vp in ignorāce & neuer shewed me my shame and miserie by Gods law: & I liued a long time, euen as a man in a dead sleepe or trance, and in truth I liued as though there were neither heauen nor hell, neither God nor Diuel. And the Diuel himself (as now I perceiue) did often perswade my secure conscience that I was the child of God, and shoulde be saued as well as the best man in the world: and I yeelded to this perswasion, and did verilie thinke it: so that when the preacher for wickednesse and securitie denounced Gods iudgementes and hell fire, I haue saide vnto my neighbours that I hoped I should be saued, and he should goe to hell: and when I was asked whether I could keepe all the commandements of the lawe I saide that I coulde, and being asked whether I neuer sinned: I saide I thought that otherwhiles I did, marrie for them which were but fewe, I hoped God woulde haue mercie, and haue me excused. And all my