A26870:78
A breviate of the life of Margaret, the daughter of Francis Charlton ... and…
A breviate of the life of Margaret, the daughter of Francis Charlton ... and wife of Richard Baxter ... : there is also published the character of her mother, truly described in her published funeral sermon, reprinted at her daughters request, called, The last work of a believer, his passing-prayer recommending his departing spirit to Christ, to be received by him.
London: printed for B. Simmons, 1681
Chapter 3: The workings of her soul in and after this Sickness.
Modern spelling is a reading aid: the words are the author’s, only the spelling is modernized. Original shows the page as printed, with the transcription marks.
§. 7. Some strivings against her fears and sorrows I find next in this Paper following, dated by her April 3.
The sadder my present condition is, the greater is the mercy that I am yet alive: why then should I not give God thanks for that, and beg the rest which yet I want? And though my life seem but a burden to me sometimes, it is my great mistake: for the greatest afflictions are nothing to hell-torments: Were they as great as ever any had, while I am alive ⟨p. 27⟩live on this side Eternity, there is hope. The time of grace is yet continued; if I be found in mercies way, I know not but God may yet be gracious, and give in my soul as he hath done my life at his peoples prayers. For I cannot but look on my life as an answer of their prayers. And sure they desired my life only that I might live to God. I desired it my self on no other terms. It was my earnest request that I might not live, if not to him. Why then should I be persuaded by Satan to think that God will not give me grace as well as life? May I not rather be encouraged with patience to wait for further mercy? It is a mercy that I am in any measure sensible of my danger, and have any desire to be holy. I will therefore stir up my soul to thankfulness, and be humbled that I can be no more thankful. I will acknowledge the mercy I have received, and the probability of future mercy: and this by Gods assistance the Devil shall not hinder me from doing.
The sadder my present condition is, the greater is the mercy that I am yet alive: why then should I not give God thanks for that, and beg the rest which yet I want? And though my life seem but a burden to me sometimes, it is my great mistake: for the greatest afflictions are nothing to hell-torments: Were they as great as ever any had, while I am alive ⟨p. 27⟩live on this side Eternity, there is hope. The time of grace is yet continued; if I be found in mercies way, I know not but God may yet be gracious, and give in my soul as he hath done my life at his peoples prayers. For I cannot but look on my life as an answer of their prayers. And sure they desired my life only that I might live to God. I desired it my self on no other terms. It was my earnest request that I might not live, if not to him. Why then should I be persuaded by Satan to think that God will not give me grace as well as life? May I not rather be encouraged with patience to wait for further mercy? It is a mercy that I am in any measure sensible of my danger, and have any desire to be holy. I will therefore stir up my soul to thankfulness, and be humbled that I can be no more thankful. I will acknowledg the mercy I have received, and the probability of future mercy: and this by Gods assistance the Devil shall not hinder me from doing.