Sinner speaks] Is this a dream! or am I waking? the goodness, greatness, glory of this sudden unexpected blessed change, tempts me to doubt whether it be true, or whether it be some unruly fancy that doth delude this wretched heart of mine? What for the Son of God to debase himself so low as to take my nature, & so my cause, and become the prisoner! What! and though he knows he shall […] ⟨p. 94⟩[…] ⟨p. 95⟩⟨p. 96⟩be cast! Will he hear the sentence, and quietly bear bolts, and shackles, and chains, which should have fettered me? Yet more than this, Doth he know it is impossible to get a reprieve from his Father and judge? and that he must most assuredly drink the bitterest dregs of Death, more bitter than Devils or damned Souls in Hell has yet ever tasted of? For it is impossible the Cup should pass: And can he, will he, dare he venture? But stay, I must be a Spouse! to be exalted from this Dunghill to be a Princess to the Son and Heir of Glory! Hold, hold, here's enough, it is a dream, an idle fancy of a distempered brain; I shall never find a heart to believe one Syllable. But yet, methinks, if it be a dream, 'tis a Golden one. Is it possible that such a damned wretch as I, could harbour such silken gilded thoughts of such love, grace, mercy and tenderness of the Son of God? Oh my heart! if they were not true, how came they into my mind, or how came they to stay? or could they, if but mere fictions, make such a change in my heart? Could they so victoriously conquer all my fear, silence ⟨p. 97⟩all my doubts, allay the heats of a scorched and be-healed Conscience? But why a dream, poor wretched heart? Didst thou not see him step off his Throne? Was it a time to dream or sleep in, when thou wert before the judgment-seat, while God was frowning, and the Devils dragging thee to and fro to get thee away to Hell? O then, just then, he stepped down, drew near and took thee by the hand, and spoke these reviving words to thee: Doubt this, and doubt thy judgment. But why a dream? I am not now in Hells torments, whither I was just now sentenced: My heart is now at ease and quiet; surely something must be the reason why the Devil that but now had hold of me, hath left me. Where is the Conscience that but now was burning in me; But Oh, cannot the presence of the Lord put me out of doubt?
Sinner speaks] Is this a dream! or am I waking? the goodness, greatness, glory of this sudden unexpected blessed change, tempts me to doubt whether it be true, or whether it be some unruly fancy that doth delude this wretched heart of mine? What for the Son of God to debase himself so low as to take my nature, & so my cause, and become the prisoner! What! and though he knows he shall 〈…〉 ⟨p. 94⟩〈…〉 ⟨p. 95⟩⟨p. 96⟩be cast! Will he hear the sentence, and quietly bear bolts, and shackles, and chains, which should have fettered me? Yet more than this, Doth he know it is impossible to get a reprieve from his Father and judge? and that he must most assuredly drink the bitterest dregs of Death, more bitter than Devils or damned Souls in Hell has yet ever tasted of? For it is impossible the Cup should pass: And can he, will he, dare he venture? But stay, I must be a Spouse! to be exalted from this Dunghill to be a Princess to the Son and Heir of Glory! Hold, hold, here's enugh, it is a dream, an idle fancy of a distempered brain; I shall never find a heart to believe one Syllable. But yet, methinks, if it be a dream, 'tis a Golden one. Is it possible that such a damned wretch as I, could harbour such silken gilded thoughts of such love, grace, mercy and tenderness of the Son of God? Oh my heart! if they were not true, how came they into my mind, or how came they to stay? or could they, if but meer fictions, make such a change in my heart? Could they so victoriously conquer all my fear, silence ⟨p. 97⟩all my doubts, allay the heats of a scorched and be-helled Conscience? But why a dream, poor wretched heart? Didst thou not see him step off his Throne? Was it a time to dream or sleep in, when thou wert before the judgment-seat, while God was frowning, and the Devils dragging thee to and fro to get thee away to Hell? O then, just then, he stept down, drew near and took thee by the hand, and spoke these reviving words to thee: Doubt this, and doubt thy judgment. But why a dream? I am not now in Hells torments, whither I was just now sentenced: My heart is now at ease and quiet; surely something must be the reason why the Devil that but now had hold of me, hath left me. Where is the Conscience that but now was burning in me; But Oh, cannot the presence of the Lord put me out of doubt?
