Death unstung a sermon preached at the funeral of Thomas Mowsley, an apothecary, who…

and then further it pleased the Lord to open my heart to visit one, who I thought might do me much good, and I judged him fit to be acquainted with my condition in that I hoped he feared the Lord, (and by the way let me tell you that I did at that time unspeakably love all such, even more than my own relations, with humility let it be spoken) and when I was with him, he joyfully received me and declared unto me many comfortable things, which (through grace) did not a little raise my dejected spirit, and he then lent me a book, which the Lord at that time opened my heart to ask for (which was Drex. d. Eternit.) and truly upon the perusal of that Treatise, I think, nay I am sure, the burden of my sins seemed to be renewed, ⟨p. 131⟩and I cannot express that unspeakable sorrow which I then had in my poor soul, by reason of all its mighty sins, and truly I hope the mercy of God was not a little cause of my trouble, to think that I should have none to offend and kick against, but those bowels, yea those tender bowels of pity and compassion, which had so long yearned over my poor soul, and had so long shielded off the stroke of Justice, which was so long hanging over my provoking head; and then, oh then I did unspeakably desire the pardon of my sins, and then did feel the burden of them so unsupportable; that I did earnestly beg of the Lord, that they might be laid upon the Lord Jesus, who was able to bear them, and did endeavour by earnest Prayers to obtain a smile from God, in and through Jesus Christ; for out of Christ he was a terrible God, and a consuming fire, and so I forthwith resolved to take up with all outward duties, as Prayer, Reading, Hearing, Conferring with good Christians, and I cannot but let you know that the first Sermon I heard in this condition was out of 1 Tim. 1.15. where it is said that Christ came into the world to save sinners, of whom I, not Paul only, but I even I am chief, and so I went on through ⟨p. 132⟩fear and trembling, and not without some joy and hopes that the Lord who had begun a good work in me, would finish it in his good time; which God grant for Christ his sake.

and then further it pleased the Lord to open my heart to visit one, who I thought might do me much good, and I judged him fit to be acquainted with my condition in that I hoped he feared the Lord, (and by the way let me tell you that I did at that time unspeakably love all such, even more than my own relations, with humility let it be spoken) and when I was with him, he joyfully received me and declared unto me many comfortable things, which (through grace) did not a little raise my dejected spirit, and he then lent me a book, which the Lord at that time opened my heart to ask for (which was Drex. d. Eternit.) and truly upon the perusal of that Treatise, I think, nay I am sure, the burden of my sins seemed to be renewed,