A57970:359
Joshua Redivivus, or Mr. Rutherford's Letters
Joshua redivivus, or, Mr. Rutherford's letters divided into two parts, the first, containing these which were written from Aberdeen, where he was confined by a sentence of the high commission ... partly on account of his non-conformance : the second, containing some which were written from Anwoth ... / now published for the use of all the people of God ... by a well-wisher to the work & people of God.Joshua redivivus, or, Mr. Rutherfoord's letters divided into two parts, the first, containing these which were written from Aberdeen, where he was confined by a sentence of the high commission ... partly on account of his non-conformance : the second, containing some which were written from Anwoth ... / now published for the use of all the people of God ... by a wellwisher to the work & people of God.
Rotterdam? : s.n., 1664
Modern spelling is a reading aid: the words are the author’s, only the spelling is modernized. Original shows the page as printed, with the transcription marks.
To Mr THOMAS GARVEN. (56)
Reverend & Dear Brother.
Grace, mercy & peace be unto you: I am sorry that what joy & sorrow drew from my imprisoned pen in my love-fits, hath made you & many of God's children believe, that there is something in a broken reed the like of me, except that Christ's grace hath bought such a sold body, I know not what else any may think of me, or expect from me: my stock is less [my Lord knoweth I speak truth] then many believe: my empty sounds have promised too much: I would be glad to lie under Christ's feet, & keep & receive the off-fallings or the old pieces of any grace that fall from his sweet fingers to forlorn sinners: I lie often uncouth-like, looking in at the King's windows: surely I am unworthy of a seat in the King's hall-floor: I but often look afar off, both feared and framed-like to that fairest face, fearing he bid me look away from him: my guiltiness riseth up upon me & I have no answer for it: I offered my tongue to Christ & my pains in his house, & what know I what it meaneth when Christ will not receive my poor propine: when love will not take, we expone, it will ⟨p. 128⟩neither take nor give, borrow nor lend. Yet Christ hath another sea-compass he saileth by, then my short & raw thoughts: I leave his part of it to himself. I dare not expound his dealing as sorrow & misbelief often dictateth to me: I look often with bleared and blind eyes to my Lords cross, & when I look to the wrong-side of his cross, I know I miss a step & slide: surely I see I have not legs of my own for carrying me to heaven, I must go in at heavens gates borrowing strength from Christ. I am often thinking, Oh if he would but give me leave to love him, & if Christ would but open up his wares, & the infinite, infinite plies & windings & corners of his soul-delighting-love, & let me see it back-side & fore-side, & give me leave but to stand beside it, like an hungry man beside meat, to get my fill of wondering as a preface to my fill of enjoying: but verily I think my foul eyes would defile his fair love to look to it: Either my hunger is over humble [if that may be said] or else I consider not what honour it is to get leave to love Christ. O that he would pity a prisoner, & let out a flood upon the dry ground! it is nothing to him to fill the like of me, one of his looks would do me meikle world's good & him no ill.