Gods husbandry

and I have allowed my self in this preposterous earnestness, and thought I had cause to be so. I have bin venturous, confident, and apt to presume of my self, and yet have never lamented this carnal confidence. I have given my self leave to do the evil in secret, which I would not for a world have done publicly, and yet have taken no care to lament it, because I thought, Pish, it is no matter, no man shall ever know it. I have given free scope to the foul motions of mine heart, and taken no care to control and oppose the looseness and licentiousness of wicked imaginations. My knowledge hath made me proud, and in some things I have refused to know, and yet I neither bewailed my pride, nor my witting blindness. I have taken no care to ponder on thy word, and settle it deeply in my soul: and yet have not seen mine own folly, in being careless to cover this seed with earth. I have mis-applied thy gracious promises in Christ, rather emboldening my self in evil by them, then using them to the purging of mine heart and life: and yet I have not lamented before thee this my presumptuousness. I have confessed my faults, but alack seldom, and when a cross ⟨p. 90⟩hath compelled me, not else. I have amended some things: but alas some thing alone, this or this (name thou the particular to God), I could never bring my self to be willing to amend: or if I have been willing for a passion, that willingness hath held but a little time, and yet I have flattered my self with vain shifts, and have not abhorred this my guile. I have indeed forborne reproachful sins; but evils of less grossness I have boldly committed, and never been troubled with them. Vain-glory hath stained my deeds of righteousness, and I have not seen and bewailed it. I could not bring mine heart to do good against evil, nor seriously blame my self for this revengefulness, but been ready to think, it was more than any man alive could be able to do. I have sought the praise of men, in acts of thy service, and it hath not been bitter to my soul to have thus mis-intended thine ordinances. I have been utterly careless of secret services, when I have seemed forward in public, and yet been well enough contented with that carelessness. I have been well enough pleased with the bare out-side of religious duties, and taken no pains to find the life of them within me.

and I haue allowed my selfe in this preposterous earnestnes, and thought I had cause to be so. I haue bin ventrous, confident, and apt to presume of my selfe, and yet haue neuer lamented this carnall confidence. I haue giuen my selfe leaue to doe the euill in secret, which I would not for a world haue done publiquely, and yet haue taken no care to lament it, because I thought, Pish, it is no matter, no man shall euer know it. I haue giuen free scope to the foule motions of mine heart, and taken no care to controle and oppose the loosenesse and licentiousnesse of wicked imaginations. My knowledge hath made me proud, and in some things I haue refused to know, and yet I neyther bewayled my pride, nor my witting blindnesse. I haue taken no care to ponder on thy word, and settle it deeply in my soule: and yet haue not seene mine owne folly, in being carelesse to couer this seede with earth. I haue mis-applied thy gratious promises in Christ, rather imboldening my selfe in euill by them, then vsing them to the purging of mine heart and life: and yet I haue not lamented before thee this my presumptuousnesse. I haue confessed my faults, but alacke seldome, and when a crosse