5 Again, a man may have true grace, and yet want assurance; and this may arise from that smoke and clouds, those fears and doubts that corruption raises in the soul; so that ⟨p. 61⟩the soul cannot see those excellent1 graces that otherwise might be discerned, though there may be many precious gems and jewels in the house, yet the smoke may hinder a man from seeing them sparkle and shine: So though there be many precious graces in the souls of Saints, yet corruption may raise such a dust, such a smoke in the soul, that the soul is not able to see them in the beauty and glory.2 The Well of water was near Hagar, but she saw it not till her eyes were opened by the Lord. So grace is near the soul, yea in the soul sometimes, and yet the soul doth not see it till God opens the3 eye and shows it. The Lord was in this 4place, said Jacob, and I knew it not; so many a precious soul may say, Grace was in my heart, and I knew it not, I saw it not. Blessed Bradford in one of his Epistles, saith thus, O Lord, methinks, I feel it so with me, sometimes as if there were no difference between my heart and the heart of the wicked; my mind is as blind as theirs, my spirit as stout, stubborn, and rebellious as theirs, and my thoughts as confused as theirs, and my affections as disordered as theirs, and ⟨p. 62⟩services as formal as theirs, &c. Ah, Christians, have not many of your souls found it so? Surely yes; no wonder then, that though you have grace, yet you have not seen it sparkling and shining in your souls, as some have thought that their fields have had no corn, because they have been so full of weeds, and that their heap hath no wheat, because nothing hath appeared but chaff, & that their pile hath no gold, because it hath been covered with much dross: So some have thought that their hearts have been void of grace, because they have been so full of5 fears and doubts. Peter at one time believes, and walks, at another time he doubts and sinks; Abraham believes, and offers up Isaac at one time, he fears and falls at another time, Say thou art my sister lest they kill me. So David and Job, they had their shufflings, tremblings, faintings, shakings,6 and questionings. It is not always high water with Saints, sometimes they are reduced to a very low ebb. The best of Saints are like the7 Ark tossed up and down with waves, with fears, and doubts;
5 Again, a man may have true grace, and yet want assurance; and this may arise from that smoak and clouds, those feares and doubts that corruption raises in the soule; so that ⟨p. 61⟩the soule cannot see those excellent1 graces that otherwise might bee discerned, though there may bee many precious gems and jewels in the house, yet the smoak may hinder a man from seeing them sparkle and shine: So though there be many precious graces in the soules of Saints, yet corruption may raise such a dust, such a smoak in the soule, that the soule is not able to see them in the beauty and glory.2 The Wel of water was neer Hagar, but she saw it not till her eyes were opened by the Lord. So grace is neer the soul, yea in the soul sometimes, and yet the soul doth not see it till God opens the3 eye and shews it. The Lord was in this 4place, said Jacob, and I knew it not; so many a precious soule may say, Grace was in my heart, and I knew it not, I saw it not. Blessed Bradford in one of his Epistles, saith thus, O Lord, meethinks, I feel it so with me, sometimes as if there were no difference between my heart and the heart of the wicked; my minde is as blinde as theirs, my spirit as stout, stubborne, and rebellious as theirs, and my thoughts as confused as theirs, and my affections as disordered as theirs, and ⟨p. 62⟩s•rvices as formal as theirs, &c. Ah, Christians, have not many of your soules found it so? Surely yes; no wonder then, that though you have grace, yet you have not seen it sparkling and shining in your soules, as some have thought that their fields have had no corne, because they have been so full of weeds, and that their heap hath no wheat, because nothing hath appeared but chaffe, & that their pile hath no gold, because it hath been covered with much dross: So some have thought that their hearts have been void of grace, because they have been so full of5 fears and doubts. Peter at one time beleeves, and walkes, at another time he doubts and sinkes; Abraham beleeves, and offers up Isaac at one time, hee feares and falls at another time, Say thou art my sister lest they kill mee. So David and Job, they had their shufflings, tremblings, faintings, shakings,
- 1The being of grace is a different thing from the seeing of grace. The blind man, you know in the Gospel, calls his faith, unbelief.The being of grace is a different thing from the seeing of grace. The blind man, you know in the Gospel, calls his faith, unbeleef.
- 2Gen. 21. 19, 20
- 3Gen. 28.
- 4Yet a Saint at worst, is not like him in Plutarch, who would not be resolved of his doubts, because he would not lose the pleasure in seeking for resolution. No he loves and looks, and longs for resolution to all his doubts.Yet a Saint at worst, is not like him in Plutarch, who would not bee resolved of his doubts, because he would not lose the pleasure in seeking for resolution. No he loves and looks, and longs for resolution to all his doubts.
- 5Matth. 14 30 Mat. 12. 15. Gen 20. Chap.
- 6Psal. 116. 11. Psal 31. 22.
- 7Rara hora, brevis mora, Ber.