The safety of appearing at the day of judgement, in the righteousness of Christ

4. Such persons labour after some goodness to prepare them for Christ. They are striving after some in order to their closing with Christ, when they are invited to come to Christ for salvation, they excuse themselves, and think they are not good enough yet to come to Christ: they think it would be presumption to come with such hearts as they have, they think no body ever came to Christ that had such hearts: but they think if they were better, they might come; and so they are labouring after some self-excellency, in order to their closing with Christ, they are purifying themselves and garnishing themselves, that they may be fit to come to Christ: they think if their hearts were more broken they might come: if they had more love to Christ ⟨p. 167⟩if they did see the real evil of sin: and so they make it their business to get these qualifications: they don't count it their next work to believe: but think they must get some other self-excellency in order to believing: so they make it their present work to mend their own heart, and sometimes they think they get a little forward, and then they go backward: just like a man that undertakes to empty a fountain, which fills as fast as he empties, or like one that attempts to fetch a dead body to life; he chases it and it grows warmer, but is as far from life as ever: so those men are striving against their dullness & hardness; they tug with their own hearts to make them better: for he thinks he must be better before he believes in Christ: whereas a Saint when he finds his heart bad comes to Christ to make it better.

5. They are discontented if they be not accepted because of their duties: if God don't comfort them, but they are held under terrors, they wonder what the matter is, and so likewise when God crosses them in his providences and follow them with afflictions: their hearts are discontented, they are heavy and displeased: they think it strange that their duties are no more regarded: that they should do so much and •e requited so: they lay hard dealing to Gods charge, think it is not equal: they are ready to look upon it to be a piece of cruelty, that God don't help them when they have done so much for him: especially if God comforts others that have not been so long in a way of Religion, they find peace and communion with God this makes the heart swell; men can't ear it that others should have mercy, and they not their services make them very discontented under Gods dealing towards them,