N04855:712
Some select cases resolved. Specially, tending to the right ordering of the heart, that…
Some select cases resolved. Specially, tending to the right ordering of the heart, that we may comfortably walk with God in our general and particular callings: &c. In a letter to a pious friend in England. / By Thomas Shepard, M.A. Formerly of Emmanuel-College in Cambridge in England: afterward Minister of Cambridge in New-England. ; Corrected by four several editions.
Boston: printed by Rogers and Fowle, 1747
MEDITATIONS AND Spiritual Experiences OF Mr. THOMAS SHEPARD.
Modern spelling is a reading aid: the words are the author’s, only the spelling is modernized. Original shows the page as printed, with the transcription marks.
And here I saw, if it was from Reason, the Power of Reason would never carry me against my own Will and my own Ends.
Octob. 18. On Monday Morning, my Child was born. And when my Wife was in Travail, the Lord made me pray that she might be delivered, and the Child given in Mercy, having had some Sense of Mercy the Day before at the Sacrament; and the Lord stayed my Heart there. But I began to think, What if it should not be so, and her Pains be long, and the Lord remember my Sin? and I began to imagine and trouble my Heart with Fear of the worst. And I understood at that Time, that my Child had been born, and my Wife delivered in Mercy already. Hereupon I saw the Lord's Mercy and my own Folly, to disquiet my Heart with Fear of what never shall be, nor will be; and not rather to submit to the Lord's Will; ⟨p. 56⟩and come what can come, to be quiet there. When it was born, I was much affected, and my Heart clave to the Lord who gave it. And Thoughts came in, that this was the Beginning of more Mercy for Time to come. But I questioned, Will the Lord provide for it? And I saw that the Lord had made Man to great Glory, to praise him, and hence would take Care of him. Though sometimes the Lord seemed to make all Men for nought, Psal. 89. Which Place I thus understood: God hath made Man for the Glory of himself, and hence to great Glory; (though he made many for Nought) especially the Church and their Posterity did the Lord make for Glory: And if God did not glorify them, then he seemed indeed to make all Men for Nought; and that when Men are not Instruments of his Glory, 'tis for Nought.—And I saw God had Blessings for all my Children; and hence I turned them over to God.
Octob. 29. I was much troubled about the Poverty of the Churches; and I saw it was such a Misery as I could not well discern the Cause of, nor see any Way out: Yet I saw we might find out the Cause of any Evil by the Lord's Stroke. Now he struck us in outward Blessings, and hence 'tis a Sign there was our Evil; (1) In not acknowledging all we have from God,