N04855:740
Some select cases resolved. Specially, tending to the right ordering of the heart, that…
Some select cases resolved. Specially, tending to the right ordering of the heart, that we may comfortably walk with God in our general and particular callings: &c. In a letter to a pious friend in England. / By Thomas Shepard, M.A. Formerly of Emmanuel-College in Cambridge in England: afterward Minister of Cambridge in New-England. ; Corrected by four several editions.
Boston: printed by Rogers and Fowle, 1747
MEDITATIONS AND Spiritual Experiences OF Mr. THOMAS SHEPARD.
Modern spelling is a reading aid: the words are the author’s, only the spelling is modernized. Original shows the page as printed, with the transcription marks.
Decemb. 4.—I felt a wonderful Cloud of Darkness and Atheism over my Head, and Unbelief, and my Weakness to see or believe God. But I saw that the Lord's Ends might be these three.
(1) By withdrawing the Spirit of Light, to give me a greater Measure of it than ever I have had before; to give me a greater Fullness by praying for more; (2) To humble me for my Confidence in my Light and Knowledge past; and in speaking so much with so little Light, who knew so little; (3) To heal this Wound of secret Atheism and Unbelief, which was but skinned over before. I saw all this was infinite Love and Mercy: Yet I saw this Condition was a deep and deadly Misery; and I saw, I should be vile indeed, if I did not mourn bitterly under it: For if I was only under the Misery of Affliction, the Lord would be displeased and count himself neglected, if I did not cry; ⟨p. 68⟩much more if I should not cry under the Power of my Sins.—This was on Saturday Night.
(1) By withdrawing the Spirit of Light, to give me a greater Measure of it than ever I have had before; to give me a greater Fulness by praying for more; (2) To humble me for my Confidence in my Light and Knowledge past; and in speaking so much with so little Light, who knew so little; (3) To heal this Wound of secret Atheism and Unbelief, which was but skin'd over before. I saw all this was infinite Love and Mercy: Yet I saw this Condition was a deep and deadly Misery; and I saw, I should be vile indeed, if I did not mourn bitterly under it: For if I was only under the Misery of Affliction, the Lord would be displeased and count himself neglected, if I did not cry; ⟨p. 68⟩much more if I should not cry under the Power of my Sins.—This was on Saturday Night.